Myers-Briggs

As I'm finally being honest to myself (which is the necessary basis for becoming an ordinary human being), I start considering that I'm INTP rather than INTJ.

The belief that introverted intuition were my dominant function stems from the fact that I value ideas a lot, and introverted intuition is the source of ideas. But as a matter of fact, I'm not that good an idea-generator. I mostly take my ideas from the external world.

It was clear for me when I got into Myers-Briggs in summer 2004 that I must be J, because of my upbringing. At least my mother is strongly J, and I've always been told, "What you do, you have to do properly." But as a matter of fact, my life-style is more chaotic than a true J's would probably be. In studying, I often digress, dealing extensively with certain chapters that currently attract my interest, instead of dealing with the chapters I actually planned to study on the very day.

The major point for me to believe I'm rather INTP than INTJ is, however, how others perceive me. Others keep telling me I'm over-analytic, thinking far too much. They've told me so in web-based forums where I write a lot. The reason why I haven't been told that before is that I'm introverted. I do not write in web-based forums to communicate with others; I simply write down what I think. It's introverted thinking.

I'm lagging behind the official medical curriculum; this is because I rather tend to make my own excursions than to follow the plans. My working is more directed towards my inner life than towards the external world. I.e., I'm not studying for my career, but for expanding my knowledge. I often post to medical students' boards and ask detailed questions not for the reason that this knowledge would really be important for exams, but to satisfy my desire for logical understanding of what I'm studying. For exams, it would often be enough just to learn some things from the book by heart, even though they don't fully make sense. (A recent example: Asthma bronchiale is treated with beta-sympathomimetics, although the bronchi are innervated by vagal fibers only; therefore, blocking the vagal fibers would be the logical treatment. So why do beta-sympathomimetics work here, too? That's one of the questions I've posted recently. The answer seems to be that beta-sympathomimetics incrase cAMP in the postsynaptic cell, while one way of vagal transmission has the effect that the level of cAMP in the postsynaptic cell is reduced. I've figured that out myself after reading about the effect of theophylline on the nervous system in Wikipedia.)

I made the experience at school that you have to show how intelligent you are, that's why I'm taking any occasion to do so - and get on the others' nerves. Probably the reason for this is that school isn't made for people like me. It's for extroverted people who like participating in activities with others. My teachers sometimes told me that I made the appearance of being totally absent-minded during their lessons. Only from time to time I raised the hand and said something clever in order to show that I was still there.

Whatever, I'm happy that I have the opportunity to study medicine, and I'm working hard in order to hopefully pass the pharmacology exam on Friday.

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